Flour-less Chocolate Cake

There are so many thoughts in my head today...so so many. They are all buzzing around wanting to find themselves on some paper but I can hardly catch them all. I'm starting to feel like I'm making progress with my head and my heart. There aren't so many conflicts between the two.

I've recently been learning a new respect for my heart. It may sound silly, but for the last 21 years of my life I have been quite the little idealist. I believed foolishly that nothing could effect me that I couldn't fix later. So I let myself love, as much or as little as I liked. It has taken me all this time to realise the cause and effect of emotions and how they can impact our lives so much. I always viewed the heart as a canvas. You can paint all over it, and if it doesn't turn out, you can through it away and start again. Unfortunately though, you only get one. So every time you 'paint' on your canvas, you have left a mark. It can be painted over, but it will always be there, creating a layer of who you are and what you have done. Every person we love deeply paints all over our canvas, and leaves a mark. Over the past nine years of my dating life there have been so many times I have wished for a big bottle of paint stripper. All the layers stay though.

I am learning that this is why we must be so careful with who we let ourselves love. Sometimes being a bit guarded in life can be a good thing. Most good chefs have at least one or two recipes that they wont share with anyone. They have these boundaries to protect their business, and keep all their secrets safe. I have heard so many stories of apprentices running off with there head chefs recipes and opening opposing restaurants. Its all about learning who we can trust and when to let down our guard. Last year, I thought I was so settled. I thought I really had met my match in life. I let down every guard I had, told all my secrets, shared all my recipes, and broke my heart.

All is not lost though. The layers, the brokeness, the beauty is what makes us who we are. Like a bottle of wine, every season the grape went through is shown in the taste. I guess its all about knowing when to love, and when to keep our hearts safe. Its a very, very slow learning process. I feel like I'm getting somewhere with it. I value my heart so much more these days, and treat it with a lot more respect. And when none of this works, when I find myself with mascara running down my face, crying in my room late at night...I bake this flour-less chocolate cake. It sounds silly, but never underestimate the soothing qualities of sifting flour, beating eggs, melting chocolate and watching it all come together. Its so nice to produce something beautiful when life is a bit hard. Enjoy

Flour-less Chocolate Cake

You will need:

• 350g dark chocolate
• 185g unsalted butter
• 6 eggs (free range please!)
• 1 cup drown sugar
• 1/4 cup frangelica
• 1 cup hazelnut meal

What to do:

1. Melt together butter and chocolate
2. Whisk together eggs, sugar and frangelica
3. Mix in the butter and sugar (let them cool a little first)
4. Mix in hazelnut meal
5. Place in a greased and lined tin
6. Bake at 170 covered for 40 minutes
7. If it is still a bit too wobbly on top take off foil and cook for another 20 minutes.
8. Completely chill and then serve.